Nothing in life is simple. Least of all sewing.
And I’ve been experiencing some moments recently when my sewing habit leaves me reflecting upon the compatibility of my identities as both a feminist and a sewist.
Most days, I kind of ignore these thoughts.
You know how it is…
Sewing is a hobby and sometimes I just want to NOT THINK TOO HARD!
But, on other days, I feel like maybe this topic could be a good conversation starter. After all, if there is one lesson that the online sewing community has taught me, it’s that you’re usually not alone…
Can I be a feminist sewist?
So, I’m just going to put it out there…
I feel that I am perhaps betraying my feminist self by loving sewing as much as I do.
Let’s face it. The credentials of home sewing may not be the best in the feminist department.
I still went to high school at a time when ‘Home Economics’ was a compulsory subject at my all girls’ school. Despite being the smartest kid in my school and of a decidedly academic bent, it was still considered necessary, in view of my future life prospects, that I be taught how to stitch up a pillow case and boil an egg.
Ostensibly for my own benefit. But, yeah, who are we really kidding?
Going back even further, my Nana was one of the kindest, strongest and most powerful women I have ever known (seriously, if only matriarchs ruled the world…). She worked as a seamstress. She managed an atelier of other seamstresses. But that was something she was really only able to do until she started having children.
For generations before us home sewing was often a financial imperative. But I can’t help but wonder whether it wasn’t also a panacea? If we give women something remotely useful and most definitely time consuming to do, maybe they’ll be less likely to ask questions. And don’t worry men, women will only ever sew clothes. We all know they’ll never be capable of actually designing, creating or generally reaping a profit from them…
In other words, I can’t help but worry that, inherent in my own personal journey towards sewing, as well as in the entire institution of home sewing, are these decidedly anti-feminist origins, the legacy of which may be difficult to escape…
So what did you get up to this weekend?
But, at least that’s all changed.
Right?
Those bad old days are in the past!
I recently read this thought-provoking blog post by Psychic Sewer Kathleen who, talking about the wonderful #SewOver50 movement, pointed out that: “The 50+ sewists grew up and matured in a time when women’s so-called hobbies weren’t valued. They weren’t considered skilful, creative or challenging. Not like male dominated hobbies such as, golfing, boating, antique car-ing, carpentry etc”. This week’s episode of the Love to Sew Podcast with Carolyn Norman touches on similar issues when Carolyn Norman (AKA Diary of a Sewing Fanatic) talks about how people used to react when she told them she sewed.
But, has it really changed?
A bit of truth here. Apart from my family and people who are genuine friends, I don’t talk about sewing much in my daily life. I don’t generally talk about it work. Nobody I work with knows that I also write a sewing blog.
If other colleagues talk about how they spent their weekend doing photography or hiking or playing golf, I don’t pipe up about how I spent mine sewing.
Why?
Because I am afraid that, under a polite veneer, of “well, isn’t that quaint”, this activity will be perceived as frivolous. I will then be perceived as frivolous and this perception will attach to my professional life. I’m afraid of becoming known as “that blonde on the sixth floor who blogs about clothes”.
I strongly suspect that the tendency to think of certain activities which have been traditionally female-dominated as frivolous and superficial and somehow ‘less’ is not as much of a remnant of the past as it should be.
And, on the body…
Not only do I question my credentials as a feminist each time I bite my tongue and think, no, this is the not the best crowd with which to talk about sewing, I also wonder what I am doing as a feminist every time I post a new blog post, featuring photos of yours truly posing in clothes.
First, there’s the issue of the fact that my obsession with garments, the inevitable end product of my sewing, reflects a concern with my outward appearance. And while I outright reject the notion that it is somehow anti-feminist to be concerned with my appearance, I do have to question how much of my interest in my wardrobe is sparked, at some level, from lessons absorbed over a lifetime as to what society expects me to look like.
And, now, on to actual body confidence…
I tell myself that what I do on this blog is a reclamation of my body. I took these images. I control them. I choose to share them because I want other women to be able to benefit from seeing them. But, there are days, when I feel particularly fearful at pressing the ‘Publish’ button, like when I’m wearing a bathing suit!
And whilst I am a huge supporter of the benefits, in terms of body positivity and self-image, that the online sewing community contributes, I’m also wary of girl power Beyoncé-style feminism in any context. The kind of ’empowerment talk’ which, at its core, is really about getting us to consume a product. I am genuinely inspired by the fact that the world of home sewing is filled with dynamic female entrepreneurs, yet, I sometimes can’t help but worry whether the message of female empowerment which sometimes underlies the modern home sewing industry can skew towards ‘consumerism as empowerment’.
And, let’s face it, I worry because I am a major consumer of sewing-related products. Rampant consumerism is fraught with risk for humanity in general but, unsurprising, for women in particular. I am fully aware that the industry responsible for the greatest systematic exploitation of women by not paying them a living wage is, of course, the fashion industry. As much as we try to side step the fact, the textile production industry is part of that fashion industry. While I try to buy fabrics and supplies responsibly where I can (and am in the highly privileged position that I am able and willing to pay more for responsibly sourced supplies), ethically responsible sewing products still make up only a small percentage of my overall sewing consumption.
So, sewing, yet again, is a strike at my feminist credentials.
And the POCKETS!!!
It has POCKETS!!!!!
And, finally, WTF is with the pockets? We all love sewing because we like to put pockets in our garments, right? The fashion industry doesn’t like to put pockets in women’s garments. For RTW fashion, clothing for women, rather than clothing for men, is about how we look, not what we need to do …
If you haven’t yet read the poem “Dangerous Coats” by Sharon Owens go and do it RIGHT NOW (you’ll find it by googling, I couldn’t find a link which I was sure was authorised by the author so I didn’t want to link it directly..). In less than fifty words, she beautifully captures the power and ‘danger’ of women (and their clothing).
But seriously, don’t you sometimes just want to go and bury your head in the sand because something as mundane and ordinary as pockets turns out to genuinely be a feminist minefield.
And, going off an a frustration-induced tangent here, since this blog post didn’t have photos of a new make to share, I wanted to try to make it visually interesting by still including some images. I went through my emails as a subscriber Death to Stock Photo, trying to source some relevant and interesting images available in the public domain. In doing so, I noticed that the stock images around the theme “New Age of Work” only featured one woman, and she was obscured by a pot of coffee. On the other hand, the stock images for the theme of “Idle” were all images of a woman!!!
Grrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!
Sometimes, it’s all a bit too much. And now I feel too guilty to make myself feel better by just sewing it all away…
And so…
So, this is the part where I should now say something inspiring.
That’s what Beyoncé would do.
But the reality is that I’m not really sure what to say.
My instagram following is around 94% female. To my knowledge, I’ve never received a comment from someone who identifies as male on this blog.
And, my overwhelming experience of being a sewist online is extremely positive. I don’t believe that this is a coincidence. I feel that the sewing world is one of the nicest, kindest and most supportive corners of the internet precisely because it is filled with so many women.
But surely, this isn’t enough. It’s not enough of an uptake to everything above to just talk about how great it is that women are nice. Surely if that’s the best ‘look on the bright side’ I can come up with, I’m really just pandering to the misogynistic stereotypes I should be disavowing.
Reality is, I’m angry as fuck. I’m angry that our society is so deeply unbalanced that even the activity about which I am most enthusiastic and passionate is sullied by the fundamental discords which continue to fracture a world in which half of the population is viewed as less than the other.
And I feel pretty powerless to do anything about it.
For the moment, my planned rebellion is as follows. As soon as he is old enough, I am going to teach my 3 year old son to sew. He already loves sitting at the machine with me and pressing buttons, so I’m pretty sure he will be enthusiastic towards the cause. I am going to teach him that sewing requires skills, dedication and technical know-how. That it demands artistic flair and a balanced eye. That textiles are works of art and design. That all bodies are beautiful. That there is someone’s hard work and labour behind every item we consume.
Here’s hoping climate change doesn’t bring about the apocalypse before I manage to impart these lessons to him at least …
So, am I alone in my rage and frustration here?
How do you reconcile being a feminist and a sewist?
Oh and, finally, a little P.S! If you like to get your blog hits through Bloglovin’, feel free to follow me over there: you can find me here. And you can find me on Instagram here.
I don’t think sewing is anti-feminist, but then I am a female sewer/knitting/weaver/spinner. I do have a son who also sews though, he’s taking sewing as a class at high school for the last 2 years and has signed up for next year as well and that’s completely by his choice. He’s almost 16 and he’s really enjoying it. Made a polarfleece sweatshirt as his first project this year and a laptop bag for his self-designed challenge. The sweatshirt wasn’t quite as good as I would have liked, his teacher lets him away with things more than I would, but it was still pretty good considering it’s only the 3rd thing he’s ever made.
Hehe – I’m sure you’re a better sewist than his teachers! It’s great that he has an interest in and respect for the field. It gives me hope for the future!
This was a good read. I’ve often thought about how sewing relates to my feminism, and I tend to see it this way: instead of a chore or a necessity, I treat sewing as a way to not be dependent on what other people want me to wear. I can choose my own fabrics and patterns and even change them to make what I want it to be. Of course there will always be influence from the rest of the world, and trends or fashion influence what’s available in terms of patterns and fabric, but I’m free to choose what to do with them. My own style tends to go from ‘classic’ feminine with fitted waists and flared or short skirts to… Intergalactic boy scout? These days I tend to just go with it and wear what makes me feel good and comfortable, without wondering too much if it’s feminist enough. Because if I wear it because I want to wear it, it’s great.
It’s interesting the intersection between fashion in general and our feminist ourselves and then the unique element that being a sewist then adds to that dynamic. It’s true that to the extent that comfortable, confident and empowered women are best placed to make a difference, sewing does have the power to support our feminist identities!
Definitely! I went on about this for a bit in a blog post just now, there’s a lot that could be said about the topic 🙂
What an interesting discussion. I tend not to think about sewing in term of female/underdog activity, as I have loved making stuff with fabrics all of my life (72 years). I did recently get cross when a feminist on the radio was suggesting that women make clothes now because in the past women had to do it to save money for the family and it was therefore a menial tasks. She obviously had done no research, as she didn’t understand that modern women make things for the joy of achievement and satisfaction of learning a new technique, and could buy clothes for half the price if clothes was what they wanted. A few years ago my husband and I spent a month with my sister in Spain, building her a wooden cabin. I loved being there and working creatively with my loved ones and other helpers who came along and joined in and cooked food. We genuinely had the best time in the world, and felt good at the end of it. BUT, I do not have the urge to make things with wood. I love sewing (has anyone else noticed that the computer doesn’t even recognise sewing as a word, it likes to correct it to seeing), I am happy to to tell anyone this, as it does not define me, it is something that gives me pleasure. So we shouldn’t worry too much about feminist issues, but encourage boys and men to take up a needle and thread. They love sewing machines, anyway. Long live the sewing network!
What a great perspective – thanks for sharing. And oh boy does my son love the sewing machine anyway. I can entirely see that perhaps I’m overthinking it and that a passion for creating something out of nothing using our own two hands is more universally relatable than I think!
Thank you for the mention Beck re my article #sewover50 🙂 I think about this topic ALL THE TIME – being a feminist & one who loves to cook AND sew. All the domestic arts I adore but I’m an outspoken feminist and have been identifying myself as such for almost 50 years. When I was 15, in grade 10 (1971), I was learning everything I could about making my own clothes and giving class presentations on what feminism means. I don’t think it makes me less of a feminist that I love to make a fab meal or sew myself up a great fitting pair of pants (actually this is truly empowering!) – I think it’s because these arts typically do appeal more to the feminine psyche than the masculine that we view them as inferior pursuits. It’s up to US as feminists to shine the light on how challenging and complex these arts truly are, IF you are serious about making something that is as beautiful as it is functional.
Thanks for the food for thought your piece gave me! I’m learning so much from the responses to this piece. It feels as though if everyone is one day as able to make as empowering choices as we are about how we wish to spend our time, there may still be hope…
Beck, this was a really interesting read! I am not a feminist at all, it is a non-issue to me. I grew up on a farm and we all worked hard everyday. We did jobs that suited our size, interest, skill and temperments. In college I got my degree in agriculture science, and started out as one of two females in a decidedly male environment. When I encountered old farmers with “sexist” views, I simply asked them if they thought their daughters could do my job well. (Always a resounding yes!) I then asserted that my dad felt the same way about me. Those crusty farmers became my best supporters and allies. Today as a 56 year old woman, I see so many women younger than me getting caught up in being a feminist. My advice, just be who you are, and if someone thinks less of you because of it, it’s their loss. Foster a great partnership with your husband, whatever that looks like, and raise your kids to be self sufficient and thoughtful decision makers.
I am not a feminist, or a house wife, or a home engineer. I am me. 🙂
That’s a great question to ask! Hopefully the men in question have daughters!!!!!
Hi Beck. Thanks for this post. Interestingly, I have the opposite feeling about sewing. (Context: I am a vocal feminist, and my definition of feminist is someone who believes that women and men should have access to the same opportunities and be free from discrimination based on their gender.) I used to shun all things that I felt were ‘feminine’, or related to women. It was learned misogyny. I knew that society did not value women or ‘women’s work’ as much as it did men, so I thought to myself, why would I want to associate myself with that stuff? So I never wore pink, I had very few female friends, I hid the fact that I was actually interested in sewing and baking and that sort of thing. So being loud and proud about loving sewing and knitting now is my own small feminist action. I am ‘reclaiming’ what I once thought of as ‘frivolous’ because they were thought of as part of the realm of women. (That’s why my blog is called Frivolous at Last.) And by being proud of the hard work and skill involved in these activities I hope to elevate them in the minds of others. This seems quite feminist to me. 🙂
Indeed! That’s a great way of thinking of it! I guess the underlying issue is still the expectations society creates for us but it’s great that you’ve wonderfully rallied against it! And thanks for the clear definition of your understanding of feminism – it makes discussions much easier in these kind of conversations which can become amorphous!
Hey! I think about this stuff, too and I’m excited you brought it up. A couple years ago I went to a talk with Andi Zeisler, the author of We Were Feminists Once. The book is about how capitalism co-opts feminism into being about individual choices and consumption. So we spend time thinking about things like “if I like sewing, am I still feminist?” But it is a distraction from the real work of feminism: making collective, systems-level change for gender equity. I’m angry AF, too!
I understand feeling helpless to change the system. You’re already finding personal ways to be empowered: writing this article, teaching your son to sew, adding pockets. What I find empowering, too, is feeling like I am making contributions towards collective action. There are discrete issues within the work of feminism: pay equity, affordable child care, electing more women into political office, stopping sexual violence, getting paid family leave, supporting feminist media, protecting reproductive freedom. Some of it depends where you live, of course. You might like “The Girl’s Guide to Joining the Resistance episode of the podcast By the Book that is about how to start working on that kind of stuff – I know it can be overwhelming to even know where to start.
You also might like Bitch Media – independent feminist critique of pop culture – and founded by Andi Zeisler
Thanks for taking the time to leave such a great comment. I’ll definitely check them out. I live in a country where I’m not a citizen and don’t speak the language so I find it difficult to be politically active. I do what I can. I am pushing for the establishment of a Focal Point for Gender Equality at my work and I try to raise my son to understand the inherent equality of all people. Today’s discussion has made it clearer in my mind that, which I’m not sure if everyone understand from my IG post is that I don’t actually feel ashamed of my sewing as ‘too feminine’ but I’m wary of other’s stereotypes and how I will be perceived in my professional life. But maybe that’s something I should worry about less!
I just do like you !
For some time now I am following you, at the beginning just because I have a french blog (not so used now) named “je pique donc je suis”, it means I sew therefore I am !
And then because I love the way you sew, the way you talk, the way you share.
I usually don’t let comments…
And I do share your thoughts and the possible strangeness / incoherence to be a feminist and a sewist, to love working and to love crafting and being with my kids.
For a long time I just separate my 2 worlds but now I am proud to be both and to show people it’s a hobbie, a pleasure to make things and to offer them. You can play music, you can play sports, you can create, and for me sewing is create.
But look, it’s the same with cooking : the chiefs are mostly men whereas the women are in their kitchen !
We still need to fight : feminism helps us to make our choices, even if for some retrograde people they can appear a bit retrograde.
Thank you so much !
Merci! Vous avez raison – c’est une dynamique qui existe partout donc il faut faire l’effort pour donner « enlightenment » aux autres si possible! Après tous les réponses qui j’avais reçu à ce post, je veux exprimer aux gens qui sait rien de tout par rapport au couture que ce soit les aspects créatifs, techniques et le satisfaction de faire qqc avec mes propres mains qui sont au cœur de ce loisir! Et vous avez fait un choix excellent pour le nom de votre blog 🙂 je veux le lire!!!
ideally there should be no such thing as ‘feminism’ as ideally there would be an equality…(I would echo Claires comment above) but sadly I think we will be forever in some perpetual motion as one previous action influences a host of others.
Embroidery and crafts (and paintings) were exhibited in the Royal Academy in the UK (around 1700/1800) with paintings until there were various decrees to exclude women showing works of art – and the art craft divide seems to have deepened. I always think the fact I can sew and make has always given me a sense of capability, and empowerment….. One time another woman made a patronising comment after I mentioned I had been sewing – I thought her pretty pathetic for it as it just showed up that she couldnt sew
Personally I think sewing and knitting should be brought back into primary schools as I was taught as then all boys and girls can do basic hand sewing. I learned knitting and sewing in primary school -while knit classes were the norm in girls schools some mixed schools did not do them, even though knitting would have been a winter past time for fishermen.
Funnily enough the hat designer Philip Tracey is from the same county as me in Ireland, and the same age as me, and when he was at primary school he asked could they do knitting, and his teacher/headmaster got everyone to learn knitting – so as to just make it another skill to learn.
Years later I was doing an art workshop in a community event in this part of the county (2000), and the comment one of the organisers made to me was ‘o this is great, this will be something for the girls to do when the boys are out playing football’ – one can only move on if others insist on holding onto such notions
Hi Beck,
This is an interesting topic.
I spent the first years of my career as a large animal veterinarian near Calgary, Alberta. Lots of guys there who thought a woman couldn’t hack it. I was fortunate in that my boss (a man) never tolerated that attitude. Not because he was a feminist but because it was him and me and if I wasn’t “allowed” to do it then he had to. LOL Whatever the reason the guys out there accepted me as one of them finally and I made out well in the industry there. There were times when it was not so pleasant but most of the time they were great. It’s funny but the my daughter could do this thing was sort of where most of those old school boys came from. I’m not sure they learned anything from me. The next woman hired after I left was given a very hard time and ended up quitting. So maybe they just accepted me because of me???
As far as sewing not being feminist I am in the camp that it most certainly is. It lets us be who we want to be and wear what we want to. Be that loose fitting more androgynous styles or the fit and flare dresses and skirts some of us prefer. I don’t feel that one style is more feminist that the other. I wear what I want. I make what I want to wear. It empowers me to make my own clothing – it fits and I feel good in it. I am so happy I haven’t bought RTW in 3 years aside from underthings which I haven’t had a chance to try making yet. I consume less because I don’t buy RTW and my ability to make my own clothes is slow because of my family and the business I own both sucking up time. I use my sewing as a way to relax and unwind and never push myself to do too much… except maybe at Christmas when I make gifts for the kids and husband.
This was a really great article and I sense your frustration. I just do me and let everyone else do them and I’m happy being me so it works out.
I think one of the really important feminist acts you discuss above is trying to use ethically and humanely produced materials. Since chances are a woman’s or women’s hands have touched everything we’re wearing, it’s an amazing chance to use consumerism for good. There’s things like ‘must-buys’ – food, energy (for example, we have one state-wide gas/electric supplier and when they pulled out of a commitment to build a wind farm we couldn’t switch away from them). But sewing turns clothes/fabric from a must-buy to a can-buy, and then we can choose to do that in a way that protects women as far as a purchase can. It’s not the only thing but it’s still a good thing!
Separate thought; men in the army are taught to sew and it’s considered self-sufficiency. There’s nothing innate about sewing (usefulness, engineering flat shapes into 3D ones, using machinery) that would be thought of as frivolous if it wasn’t associated with femaleness. Like, sexists think either sewing is ‘cute’ because women do it or women are ‘cute’ because they sew, and either way they’re wrong. I want to scrape misogyny off of our and any skilled craft. Hobbies don’t have to smell like mahogany and leather conditioner to be honorable.
This is all part of a huge conversation. But I’m following with interest!
That’s a great point about how the manipulation of 3D shapes for functional purposes by use of machinery has become entirely feminized! You put it so eloquently. I think I will find that a really valuable perspective to use when trying to explain to non-sewists why sewing deserves more credit than it may receive! This is indeed a huge discussion and it’s been really wonderful to see that it’s an important discussion for so many of us in the community